I know you are, but what am I?

Poor Squidward. He has to put up with Spongebob and Patrick every day!

This a self-amusing list of insults I have come up with.

You are a/an...

-Uncle Vernon

-Aunt Petunia

-Aunt Marge

-Voldemort

-Nimrod

-Rotten Banana (or any other fruit/vegetable you don't like)

-Megalomaniac

-Mosquito---->I need repellent now *roll eyes*

-Eraser

-Thumbsucking-vermin-infested-squirrel-duck-with-no-socks-and-platform-shoes

-Sidonia

-Baboonic Buffoon

Did you...

-Forget to put on you aluminium cap today, 'cause it looks like the aliens are at it again, you know, brainwashing and stuff.

-Forget to recharge your brain cells today?

-Recharge your battery today? You seem so much brighter now.

-Progress onto the next stage of your speech development? 'Cuase you still don't make sense.

-Not see the sign. It says 'No pestilential people permitted past this point/allowed here'

This one is from a 'The Clique' book(don't remember which one), by Lisi Harrison

Are you poor? Then why don't you have any common sense?

Here is a short list of quick comebacks.

My personal favourite is:

'Obviously you're unable to assimilate my stimulating concepts into your blighted and retarded world-view.'

Here is another site, especially for kids to use on their friends.

Here is the WikiHow How to Think of Quick Witted Comebacks

REMEMBER: BULLYING IS BAD. DO NOT USE THESE REMARKS TO HURT SOMEONE'S FEELINGS. THE AFOREMENTIONED SHOULD BE USED LIGHT-HEARTEDLY.
SWEARING IS NOT COOL EITHER!